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05/19/07 Current mood: chipper The best part of watching the Neverending Story on acid?? Well I'm so happy you asked... As weed makes you listen to every one of your favorites albums again... Well acid does the same for movies. I should do my own list of how I process movies normal/tripping. The thing that stuck out most to me about the Neverending Story was "The Nothing" "The Nothing" is the great blanket of darkness that sweeps Fantasia... It can't be stopped... Because no one believes in Fantasia anymore.... While tripping out last X-mas Eve and watching the Neverending Story (Don't ask... No one asked me to hang out...) I discovered that "The Nothing" had somehow broken through the TV screen and was sweeping through my bedroom and the whole city of Boston! Yikes! I had lost my drive in life. I was doing just enough to get to sleep at night without worry... And without anything to look forward to really... I figured I would mail in my lifetime and expect things to be straighten out in Heaven... Maybe this was hell... And everything would be straightened out up there...... Find the girl I should of loved up there... And find the thing I really wanted to do for a living... Only it would be Heaven and it would be expected... That's no fun. I think the biggest change in me this past year was expecting something out of life again... Well more of trying to set my plate so I could expect things to happen again. I turned off my TV three years ago when I moved to Allston... I was tired of comparing my own adventures to those on TV... I always felt envy... And besides it gave me so much more free time at night to figure out how I really wanted to spend my time..... I usually just played my guitar and wrote songs... I would tear up the lyrics to the next morning because I didn't put enough funny lyrics in them. My sadness comes from the fear that life might never be as whimsical and adventerous as I imagine in my head. I do make every effort to set the pieces on the chess board the way I want them to be... But I can't control what the world has planned for me... Or even worse if it doesn't really have a plan for me.... In my eyes at least. But what else are you going to do in your lifetime if your not willing to commit to a battle and believe in something. Quite a few of my friends do play it safe... Agnostic, gray, flowing in the wind. I'm fully aware of the fact I might fail miserably at the dreams I have for life... But at least I'm going to try and fuck it up, and have no one to blame in the end. Hey... There's no promise of anything... But there's no promise of nothing either. I think from any perspective I would be proud of what path I'm taking... We always hate when our hometeam starts pulling out key players in a blowout... Because we feel there's always a chance to comeback. I consider myself very spiritual. I believe we're not just shit-makers with sneakers.... But I also don't believe in putting a label on the energy around us... And you don't need a book to tell you that people generally know to be kind to their neighbors. What people like Nietzsche lay out, and what Bill Hicks makes simple is the fact that... We can go for dreams in this lifetime that are so amazing and crazy....well... we might never make it there.....Well most of us don't...As children we had battle plans...Then we needed to pay rent..... But after you figure out how to pay rent you can start again... We can set the bar so high and think of something so far-fetched... And who the fuck is someone to stop you.....they already gave up...they want company..... What is so amazing about humans is the fact we are still evolving. Just by bringing a new idea into this world your part of the show... Who cares if you fail. Fuck I fail alot.... My albums are so far under the radar that....Well.... I've release an album a year for the past three years... Did you know that? EXACTLY! Neither did my Dad. I'm afraid that I won't be able to deal with the fact I might come way short of my ambitions.....Way short....like fucking short man...like..uhhh... Tagged out while running to first base on a check swing......I worry... How people will treat me after the fact... I would probably go into hiding... Move to Maine, and work flea-markets selling air-brushed t-shirts with eagles flying over wolves howling at the moon. I really like when that other chick in Fleetwood Mac sings...Christine not Stevie .... Couldn't think of a way to finish this one. "I don't want no damage, but how I'm gonna manage you?"... She's the shit!!! Good song! E-mail Robby at robbyroadsteamer@aol.com 
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